I’m proud to go to a school where I’m the problem of the day for offensive language. Not for the slew of profanity I use in everyday conversation, but because the word “DICK” is on the cover of the book I was reading in study hall.
drinking game: look through your old fb messages. take a shot every time you added that awkward “haha” at the end of messages to show how fun and casual you were
So yesterday I felt like shit and drove myself to CVS to pick up some Pepto Bismol. While I was there I passed the “miscellaneous things we don’t talk about” isle and remember that I was out of condoms, so I picked up a box. I went to the checkout and there was only one cashier there, a girl that couldn’t have been older than 16 and looked like she wasn’t quite accustomed to working in a drugstore yet. She gave me the most curiously frightened look which is when I realized this purchase might be classified as a bit weird. Instead of trying to explain myself I just shrugged and said “My girlfriend works at Taco Bell and said she’d bring dinner home with her tonight.” and walked away.
hey government can I have some money to go to university
sure here you go. you'll have to pay it back but only when you're earning £21,000+ a year, and if you don't pay it off after 30 years we'll just write it off, don't worry about it man
nah man just go to uni we ain't gonna charge you
no. you gotta pay it yourself. upfront. your parents have to save up from the moment you're born. good luck, fucker.